Hmm..

So I’ve been feel so blah lately.  Totally up and down, going to the doc tomorrow to have them check my meds. Hate absolutely hate being on medication that controls my moods, anyone else in the same boat knows what I mean, I hate having a “chemical imbalance”  Who came up with that term anyways.  It makes me sound like a science project gone arry.   On day 5 at work, one more to go and I can relax.  Rooms a mess need to find a way to orgainize it a little better.  Need a shelf I think that would realy help.  No man to speak of. Too chicken shit to tell the one I want that I want him, well I don’t know that he’s in a position to start a relationship, so part of it is being too chicken shit and another part is trying to respectful of him.  That’s life I suppose, always looking for the right time to make the right move and so on and so forth.  Hopefully things will get interesting soon and I’ll  have something exciting to talk about, until then I’ll just enjoy the peace and calmness of my life……

The Return of Zack Morris! Fucking Hilarious…

The Return of Zack Morris!

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So this is it.  My Thirtieth birthday is drawing closer and closer.  I would like to say I’m 29 and holding strong, but lately everything seems to be falling apart.   I’m not where I thought I would be at 30 but then again I don’t think anyone is realy where they want to be exactly when they turn 30.  Then again maybe some people get lucky and everything works out exactly as they had always hoped.  As for me I’m single.  I am so very very single.  My car is a POS and I am trying to buy a new one, because I can barely get back and forth to work.  I need to find a new place to live so I am on my own again and surrounded by my own stuff which I miss.  So yes I am 30 I have no a shi tty car, I don’t own a house, I have no kids, I am single, and everynight I sleep with an oversized Orangutang that my exboyfriend gave me.  I’m pathetic.  I hope my 30’s turn out to be way better than my 20’s because my 20’s have sucked.  Wow I realy do need to get a new positive attitude.  I will put that on the top of my check list.

Baby Burtha is Bummed..

My poor poor car has one again crapped out on me, and now I am on a mission to find a new one.  I am so frustrated and I know that Baby Burtha is bummed to be retiring after all these years, she has been very good to  me and all my passengers.  I hope she can rest easy in car heaven.  Hopefully soon I will be introducing a new member of the family which will hopefully be as reliable as Baby Burtha was.

Yes, I realize I will be watching this alone.

I am super excited to see the story of  Salvador Dali come to the big screen in “Little Ashes”  I can only hope Robert Patterson does not disapoint.

Movie Preview

Bea Arthur Dies at age 86

Hmm I don’t Know About This…..

Plan B to be available to 17 year olds.

There is also consideration that plan b will be available to women of “all ages” without a prescription.  I guess that goes back to the age old discussion, what makes a women a women, and if at age 10,11, or 12 it is felt that “women” are responsible enough to decide the fate of an unborn child and what is and what is not physically and emotionally best for their bodies then what is holding them back from legally being able to make other life changing decisions?  I guess we will see where this will go and what kind of doors it will open for law makers to argue for in the future.

Less than Perfect

I found this while going through some old poetry and even today it still holds true… well maybe a few things have changed.

Less than perfect.

I will always be less than perfect.

I will always say the wrong thing to the wrong people, at the wrong time.

I will always laugh at things no one gets and humor myself when there’s know one around to humor. And I will always be less than perfect.

My eyes will always be Hazel and they will change with the season or with my mood.  My hair will never be the same color or the same length or style and I will continue to buy the box that matches my latest shade of nail polish or my new pair of shoes.  I will paint my nails obsessively and wear make up even when there’s no place to go, I’ll wear it with that party dress that hangs in my closet collecting dust and I’ll lay on the couch with a bottle of champagne watching silly movies about life and how much it sucks, And I will always be less than perfect.

I will always be a little crooked, and my legs will never be quite long enough.  My boobs will always be way to big, and my ass will always look tight in whatever jeans I happen to be wearing. My feet will never be tiny and my body never petite, my teeth will never be perfect and my ears will always look bigger when my hair is tucked behind my ears, and the scar above my eye from playing soft ball will always be there, and I will always be less than perfect.

I will never be Miss America, or the next homecoming queen, I will always prefer a drinking contest to a beauty pageant, and I will always try to out spit any guy that dares to take the challenge.  I will never be quite lady like and I will always cuss to much and be just a little to perverted, and I will always forget that some people actually think that love and sex are the same thing, and I will always be less than perfect.

I will never be able to take back my past, or to relive it.  I already lived it once and didn’t do such a good job the first time.  I will never know exactly what to say, or how to dry someone’s tears, I will always laugh in the middle of a fight and find the one thing that will send the other person over the edge.  I will always get just a little mad when someone tells me I’m wrong, and I will always get a little angry when my thoughts and ideas don’t come out right.  And I will always be less than perfect.

I prefer football to tennis, and ballet to golf, I prefer jeans over a dress, and sandals over heals, I will always keep my haired pulled back and unkempt, I prefer brains over beauty, and personality over money.  I will never have the perfect guy, the most attractive, or the one every girl wants, but he will be mine and I will treat him right, because he will love me even though he knows I will always be less than perfect.

Xavier Rudd

A friend introduced me to a new artist.  He has an awesome voice and he’s kinda hot!

My Summer Reading List Thus Far.

Alice Hoffman

Incantaion

Indigo

Dan Brown

Angels and Demons

Alex Kleinzher

Sleeping it off in Rapid City

Brian Bedard

Hour of the Beast and Other Stories.

Lisa See

Snow Flower and The Secret Fan